ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
I need water and some morals
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
