Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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