Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
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