I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
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