So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
he just fucked me for my cheese..
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
