it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
