DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
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