What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
