doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
