If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished�
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
