why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
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