What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
