Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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