these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
