I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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