You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
