Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
