i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
