I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
