when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize