were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
