piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
