they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
