why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
