You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
