Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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