her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Randomize
