That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
All the doctor said was why
Success! We fucked roommates!
The adults are the big ones right?
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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