you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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