yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
