Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
