You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
