gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
