Where are you?
In a non slutty way
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize
