Kiss
Puke
Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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