i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
