come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
