Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize
