He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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