Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
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