just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
