We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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