So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Randomize
