no. you can't hotbox the world.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
