I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
