WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.�
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
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