guys are not supposed to queef...right?
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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