dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
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