it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Randomize
