bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
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